How do you die so that you can live? Many religious traditions reference this mystery, but what does it mean?
I think it means this: there are parts of all of us that have developed throughout our lives to protect us. And when we reach a safe place, and can allow these parts to drop away and die, our original—and real—essence emerges.
In dying, we find an opportunity to be real. And in that being, we find all the joy and peace and belonging that the great religious traditions of the world point us towards.
I have spiritually died about four times in my life that I can recall. These were crises that changed everything about me from the inside out. In fact, just last year, I think I hit the jackpot of internal deaths. I discovered some very deep truths about myself that were likely obvious to others, but not to me. Let’s just say, they weren’t pretty. As the old saying goes, the truth hurts—and it did. A large part of me died. Now, 12 months later, I can say with astounding gratitude: THANK YOU!
Death is in abundance. It’s a part of every human experience. We live to die. And in between the stages of birth and death, ego comes into the story to make things more interesting for everybody.
The thing about ego is that it’s a double-edged sword. It will save you some times, and other times it will kill you. Sounds intense, right? What I mean is: when it’s not protecting you, it will cut you off from people and opportunities. More importantly, it will cut you off from yourself, the real you.
Dying inside is essential to living. When parts of us die or fade away, we can resurrect the real us, the us-in-the-now. The people whom we are meant to be today. Not last year, not when we were 10 years old, and not 20 years from now.
Every moment of our life contains constant death and rebirth. Allowing old relationships to fade away. Allowing old roles or desires or dreams to come or go. Deaths can feel really difficult as they occur, but in my experience, letting go means so much more than giving something up. It means giving birth. It means birthing something that has not yet had the chance to experienced itself through you. You are everything, and there is nothing that you cannot be or do. You are here to channel the best version of yourself for this lifetime — don’t settle.
That means be. ing 100% you in a 100% real world, 100% of the time.
In 2014 I was gifted a dream: Oprah welcomed me into her penthouse, where I pitched my idea of a TV show called Get Real. Afterward, one of my beloved mentors, Ruby Tunke, told me it wasn’t about getting” it was about being. The be. real Retreat was born.
Immediately following that dream and without any hesitation, my spirit guides and my deceased Granny masterfully created an experience for everyday individuals to go and discover themselves. To the depths of their soul, members of the be. real community can uncover what it means to be them. Why they are put on this planet. How to find inner joy and contentment the rough patches and how to be bold and brave in the easy ones.
Life is about being real, in the good, the bad, and the ugly moments. Yes, it’s true that not everyone will love you in your so-called ugly moments. But we all have them, and believe me, there’s space for that.
Meditation, intuition and spiritual connection have saved me more times than I can count. It is my greatest passion to share my tools and teachers with you so that you too can be. real.
After 5 years of be. real Retreats, we are offering a 1-day event for the first tim